Come Closer (Finale: The Flight Of The Bumblebee)

Before going through the events that took place during the last night of my stay, it is essential we get to know the puzzle-guy better. He was an average guy in terms of stature. He looked pretty normal and I've never seen him doing anything abnormal unless one considers solving puzzles to be extraordinary. The only problem with him was that he never talked. One day he walked in and sat on a chair in the reception room, playing with his fingers. For a long time they tried to somehow communicate with him but he kept staring in their eyes saying nothing and sitting there. They finally gave up and took him in. Ever since, he just sat in his room. Every day he walked to the lounge, sat behind the same table and solved the same puzzle over and over and over again. He randomly made eye contact with people, like when I walked in the lounge for the first time. This was more or less everything known about him.

I couldn't bare to sit in my room even for one more moment. I just couldn't take it anymore. Therefore, I grabbed a packet of smokes and stormed out. The lounge was a rectangular shaped space, located at the far end of the southern wing, stretched from the west side to the east, covering the width of the building. There was this chair in the lounge that was my favorite spot. It was located on the right side of the room and was facing eastward. The many moon rises I watched siting on that chair. There was a set of three windows on each of the opposite walls and on the southern wall there were many windows approximately the same size of the other ones, but they somehow felt a bit smaller. That night I sank in my favorite chair, staring at the blank outside the eastern windows. I had a couple of smokes before it started. Even to this day I could never make heads and tail of it but somehow I managed to make my peace with it.

The puzzle-guy walked in. It was sometime around 2:30 or 3:00 am. based on the location of the moon I say it was around 3:00. that moment I realized his name. I'm positive his name was Jeremy. I never asked him because I'm not the type of guy to ask redundant questions, and well, I knew the answer anyways. There was a jar sitting on one of the tables. Jeremy took it. He went to the water dispenser and filled almost two-third of it. Then he placed it on his table next to the completed puzzle. At that point for a very brief moment I wondered how many times that puzzle has been completed, destroyed and again made complete. But I didn't really care about the answer. He repositioned the jar many many times with an extraordinary obsession. It kind of reminded me of my first day there but his was less grave. He walked out, after feeling satisfied with the positioning and I lit another cigarette.

He came back of course, holding something in his hand. I couldn't really see anything but based on the gesture of his hand I can say it was an imaginary flower or something alike. He placed it in the jar and spent another good deal of time repositioning it. It was then when he first noticed my presence. He was just not satisfied with the arrangement so he grabbed the flower, walked toward me and gave it to me. Then I realized it was a Rose. A Black Rose I presume. I couldn't see it but I could clearly smell it and I never make mistakes about the smell of roses. It was such a generous offer that as a token of my appreciation I just respected his silence and replied with a faint smile.

He walked toward the window. The one in the middle of the eastern wall. I had a notion of how this scene is about to end. Yet, there was such a solace, such warmth, such tranquility and peace that I was positive, at that moment, there couldn't possibly be any bad outcome to any given act. So I remained seated and watched the show through.

He opened the window and stayed motionless for some moments only breathing the fresh air. I could use some of that too. I banished all the thoughts off my mind and joined him in inhaling the purity that was slowing filling the room. Then it happened. With such arranged and careful movements, he walked out of the window and I think I saw him flying. I could never tell what exactly happened that night and atop all, a flying human being never made any sense to me. Yet, the picture still remains. All I know is that he left that hideous place.

So I sat there, cause there was nothing I could go back to, other than that room. No that wasn't an option. And so I sat there, holding my rose, smelling it every now and then. Enjoying myself. And so I sat there, having some more smokes before the sunrise. It was one of the most beautiful sunrises I've ever seen.

Then I got up. Went back to my room. There I left the rose with my roommate. I placed it next to her pillow. I packed my stuff. Kissed her forehead gently not to wake her. I still don't know why I did it but at that moment it made sense, so I'm fine with it. I walked out of the room and on my way I checked with Mathew. He was asleep so I just left him a note. I believe he never read it. Everyone else was also asleep so I wasn't really bothered on my way out. I stepped in the elevator, then into the alien corridor, out the main gate and walked my way through the garden to the drive way and I was gone.

The End

The Book Ov Revelation

I had an awful week. Agonizing pain and irritations and so on. And as per usual I preferred to stay away and not being seen in my darkest hours. This superficial illusion of strength I'm eager to propagate sometimes becomes sickening even to my own self. But beyond all these and beyond all the pain and problems I learned a number revelations and realizations which am willing to share. I'll make a list and try to keep in brief...

• Physical pain can actually lead to temporary sever depression.
• Shower is the best thing humankind ever invented.
• Even though I hate it, having Caviar for the breakfast always makes me feel good.
• Rocking chairs ROCK!
• Sometimes one really should keep ones distance from ones near ones.

Come Closer (Part II: The Setting Son)

Our first encounter didn't really turn out to be anything I ever thought. It took all my courage to turn that handle and walk in. And I was prepared for an extremely awkward greetings. But then I saw her. She was sleeping. And Yes, that was out first encounter. She was laying on a bed covered in white sheets and white pillow covers and white everything. She was also covered with a white blanket. I didn't really try to make any noise but one way or another, the nervous I was, I managed to make a good deal of noise dropping a few things on the way to my side of the room. She didn't wake up. Some hours later I realized she actually couldn't wake up, because of the very strong painkillers she was on.

It was rather discomforting. Yet, as I have mentioned before everything in the southern wing was colored white. A few times I tried to argue with the attendants that this color is not really a good choice for such a place but no-one really listened to me. I bet they didn't even care and I never knew why.

At one end of the room opposite to the door the wall was covered with a line of big windows which I considered a blessing as I really like to have the sunlight and a lot of it. At Her side of the room, the left side, there was her bed and there was also a closet. The same pattern worked on my end of the room except a door that opened to an attached bathroom and toilet. In the middle, next to the window covered wall, there was a table and a couple of chairs on each side of it. The table had a built-in drawer, in which you could find a number of common, and boring, board games such as the chess, the snakes and ladders and a couple of other games. Next to each of the beds was a small table that served a general purpose. That was more or less all about the room. Other than that there was only the lighting system which wasn't really interesting and nothing else, worth mentioning, was in the room.

I just dropped my belongings on one end of the bed and sat in the middle of it. Uh yes! I forgot to tell you anything about the stuff I carried in to accompany me during that period. I had rather a cheap and small mp3 player and a pair headphones of not such a great quality, a number of books amongst which I really cared for only two, some music CDs in case I ever find a computer to update my mp3 player's playlist and a number of other not-really-useful stuff that I deemed entertaining when I was packing my things. I sat on the bed, facing the other end of the room and stared at that thing laying on the other bed that everyone was so eager to call Human. Based on the movements of sun, I should say I was sitting there staring for about half and hour or so. Yes! When you don't really have anything to do and you are bored and you just don't belong, you start noticing everything. Even those things, everyone would surely take for granted in any normal situation, like the movements of the sun and the moon. After I stared for good deal of time, making sure nothing extraordinary is going to happen and no one is about to jump in middle of the room and start making faces and no alien is going to shine through the window panes, I rose and busied myself with placing my things in my closet. There were some fresh clothes, towels and stuff in the closet but that is not really important and is not worth mentioning. It took me another good deal of time to arrange my belongings. I had this unnatural obsession about positioning them in a correct order and nothing seemed to work out.

I have to admit what I was doing was simply and excuse to escape the many questions. They were running and screaming around in my skull. The many unanswered ones, I called them later. What the hell was I doing there? How in the hell's name did I decide, it's a good idea to commit such an stupid act? Was I really here “to be there” for her? Did I even felt strong enough about her to do such a thing? And many more unanswered ones...

The whole process of placing my belongings took so long that when finally one of the caretakers arrived telling me that the lunch is being served in sometime, I was really relieved to be able to let go of rearranging the positions of two CDs and do something else. He woke her up as well. We greeted with an improper good morning, as it was almost the lunch time, a short and a not-very-friendly hug. Then she was off to the restroom to freshen up and get ready for the lunch. 20 minutes later we both left for the lounge to have the meal.

As mentioned before the lounge was at the end of the corridor which ran all the way through the southern wing. When we arrived there, all the people have already started the lunch and thankfully no one really paid any attention the the new-comer! I kept my eyes down not to get caught in a direct eye to eye contact. There was just one thing that really seemed interesting. There was this guy sitting behind a table with his head bowed and not really paying any attention to his surroundings. He was solving a puzzle! It didn't really fit, but well, nothing made any sense in that place. He lifted up his head and looked me directly in the eye. Damn! I was caught! But no, he lowered his head again and busied himself with his thing.

Nothing else worth mentioning happened during that lunch time. Nor anything interesting happened during any of the next 21 lunch times I spent there. Nor during any other time.

If you ever bothered to re-picture the geography of the southern wing you might have noticed that my room, which was on the right side of the floor, had a beautiful view towards the west. The windows opened to another garden and a lake. It stretched down to the horizon, behind it one had a pleasant view of the sunset. That evening I went out to walk the halls and see what is going on. I never walked further than the adjacent room. The door of the room was open. This room was different. It only had one set of bed and closet and there wasn't any lame board-game table in it. Instead there was a wheelchair. Resting in it, there was a Thing. So happened that when I was busy looking at the wheelchair one of the caretakers passed by me. He started whispering in my ear: “He's name is Mathew. He is 23 and his brain doesn't really function anymore. We are taking care of him. I sit him every evening there so he can watch the sunset. I think he likes it.” I don't really know how it happened but I found myself asking how this fate befallen him. The reply was rather simple. He used to much drugs.

And this was how I met my very first friend whom I chose for myself and didn't really meet in a family gathering or in the school or some other boring situation like that. I spent most of my time there with him. I can't say we had a lot of fun. We didn't really do anything together. Most of times we just stared at eachother or watched the sunset. Like that caretaker said, I also think he liked watching it. In some rare occasions we sat with a group of people and again we didn't do anything. We just sat observing, listening and waiting for our time to come. At some point I even decided to shift my room and become his roommate but then I changed my mind. I decided not to intrude his privacy. I also thought in any friendship maintaining a certain distance is a contributing factor to the continuity of that friendship. So I never moved in.

And the time passed. There were two more rather curious characters as well. You have already been introduced to one of them. The puzzle guy. Whom I only visited a couple of more times during the lunch times sitting on the same table doing the same thing. And this other guy. He was such a pain in the ass. Whenever I encountered him, he was reciting a passage in Latin. I never got what he said and I never really cared. He was just walking on my nerves. There were some points I was ready to do anything just to make him stop, but I never did. And even now, I am positive, if he is still alive, he is still reciting that same passage.

Every single day was the same as the previous one. Starting with a good morning, a not-very-friendly hug with my roommate, having meals, hanging out with Mathew, seeing the passage guy and so on. And so it drew nearer and nearer to the time I was about to leave. I deeply hoped for a boring ending. As boring as how it kept on going. But it wasn't suppose to work that way. Little did I know, no one would ever get of out of that place the same as they walked in. And so finally came the last night of my stay.

To Be Continued...

This Picture

Of course she was my maid. That was exactly how we met in the very first place. I still remember that day. It was the second day after I moved into town. It was a small town, down the River Blossom's region. I called the services and asked for a maid the next morning exactly at 10, as planned before, she was there knocking at my door. I can't really say I fell for her at the first glance. She looked cute and sexy but it wasn't until I realized about her delicate taste in everything that I started to feel attracted to her. It started with me giving her huge tips. It felt wrong. Yet, as you might have noticed I'm a bit shy when it comes to hitting on my maids!

The huge tips, her regular comings and goings and me keeping an eye on her kept on going for some time. But then, in a rainy day in the peak of rainy season when it was pouring outside mercilessly, she came up to me. At that moment I was trying to pretend I'm busy playing the Mondscheinsonate on the piano. I really wasn't. Lets keep it on a hush-hush, but I just couldn't focus on anything when she was around. So, whenever I noticed she's watching me, I used to pretend I'm busy doing something. As I was saying; she came up to me and I had a feeling she finally realized something really fishy is going on. She said that I don't need to keep buying her company and that I could just tell her I like her. Apparently a long time before that incident she gave me a very obvious signal that she likes me. Stupid me! I was never good with signals. I used to always have problems learning boy scout's signals as well when I was a kid!

And this was how we started to date. For the first few months people talked, knowing my position and our previous relationship. We never cared. We were so happy when we were together. The least I know is that I was, I was very happy to be with her. Time passed. Everything was perfect. We used to spend a lot of time together, hanging out almost everyday. Back then I was a studio musician. I pulled some stings, and she became employed in a record company whose boss was a close friend of mine. She was very hardworking and dedicated. Oh! The number of rewards and achievements she made during that year! yet she never left her old job. Everyday exactly at 10 she came up at my door and cleaned the house. Many times I objected but she said she loves to do so because that was how we met. So eventually I just stopped and let her do her thing.

Time passed by and the next rainy season came pouring in our small town again. The rainy seasons are horrible in these parts. sometimes the rain starts and just don't stop! It doesn't really cause much problem, you know, like floods and all but the thunderstorms doesn't really sound pleasant to my ear! They hurt! And the lightnings, they are also a bit terrifying. Every year there are a couple of casualties because of them but the chances of getting hit by a lightning is so small that no one really cares about them.

It was more or less the end of the first month of the rainy season when it happened!I was sitting on my beloved chair reading through a new book, I just bought the day before. It wasn't something extraordinary but it was entertaining enough and for the time being I didn't have anything else to do. Then she came, exactly on time, again as the very usual. That was one of the things I liked very much about her. She was never late. There wasn't much to be done around the house so she finished early and went out to the back of the house to soak in the hot-tub for sometime before she leaves for work. I had to leave to work as well so I just got dressed and went back to kiss her goodbye. And there I saw her. Lying on the ground. With burns and bruises on her chest. Why of all things should she be struck? Why? I rushed back and called the emergencies but there wasn't anything they could do. She was already far gone.

The world kept on turning. it was as if nothing had happened. No one noticed. No one cared! I didn't care! And that just felt so damn wrong! Yet, what could I do? It was the way it was! I was the way I was! So I just moved on with my life. yet I felt so wrong, I made a small cemetery in my backyard. A tomb stone, stupidly lying: “Here Lays Our Beloved Adrianna […].” enclosed in a railing with a small entrance metal gate and flowers and so on. I dropped by randomly and grieved at her grave but it was simply to ease the guilt of not feeling anything.

There are many stories and myths in the region of the ghosts of people to appear at night in the house, if you keep their bodies in the premises. But seriously who in their right mind would ever believe such nonsense?

It was June 13th, around 2:30. Me and Claire were in the tub making out. I was getting bored, I mean come on, we've been there for 30 minutes already kissing eachother. Drastic measures called for drastic actions and so I got to the point and she followed me happily. It was in the middle of it, when out of nowhere I lifted my head up. And there next to the southern wall of the house in the darkness I saw an apparition. It was glowing pale green. It just stood there staring at us, doing nothing and there was no expression on its face. We stared at eachother for some minutes then it faded. I stood. Walked out of the tub and back into the house. I was all wet, dripping all over and most probably I was to mess up the whole house but who cared, tomorrow at ten my maid will come and she will clean up the mess I made. I just went and sat behind the piano. It was an old, second handed upright. I bought it in a very good deal. I sat behind it and the next thing I knew, I was playing the Mondscheinsonate.

A Dream Of Mirrors...

There are things which you just don't know. Then there are things which people don't want you to know. And then there are things that they just can't share. And those things hurt. Yet on top of all, it's my asshole that hurts oh so bad!

The years roll on. Winds still Blow. Snows still fall. Fires still burn. Nothing has changed. 

Yet, I have changed. 

Is That My Punishment?

And this is when you arrive at a fork on the road and you find yourself on your knees, begging; PLEASE! No More Choices!

De Comedy Ov De Brave New World

There are poisonous snakes with double tongues.

There are horny hedgehogs who do their wrongs.

There are deaf men and blind worms, they'll not be seen.

There is a government with a parliament of whores.

They are pawns and rooks for a Crimson King!

P.S. Artwork By: Sarah Danes Jarrett

When The Sky Fell...

Suddenly there was a thunder and a flash of lightning,

It cleaved the sky in two, there were cracks all over its face. 

Shattered into pieces, the sky tumbled and fell.

There he sat in darkness now surrounding all around him. 

All was motionless. 

And motionlessness was all. 

There wasn't any sound nor anything moved.

Then he rose,walking on the pieces of a shattered sky that there was no more.

Then In the grave stillness suddenly came a soft breeze. 

It touched his face and danced in his hair.

I thought I caught a glimpse of a single drop of tear, 

And heard him whispering to the breeze, Saying:

Please Tell Her To Bring Back My Sky...

The Crash

I was lying down on a coach in a moving train. My eyes were feeling heavy and I was fleeing quite sleepy. I remember I had my headphones on but there wasn't any music playing. I was just too tried to reach and play something on my iPod. I decided to let it be and don't move, maybe this way I would be able to get some sleep. My headphones got serious noise-suppressors but if the music is turned off I can hear conversations and other types of noise specially rumbles!

Eventually I noticed, this moving train is my friend's office. I was still laying down on the same coach. I could see his boss sitting behind his desk in the room which was at the end of the hallway. My friend was also there he was sitting behind another desk, this one was located in the hallway near to where my coach was. Both of them were accompanied by one of their co-workers. After some minutes I noticed 2 men leaving the boss's room. They came and sit on a coach that was next to me. I was still lying down keeping my eyes half closed trying not to be noticed by anyone. One of them started a conversation with my friend. At first I wasn't really paying any attention and was just watching the views passing by outside the window next to me.

Then I heard them talking about a subject, something work-related, that also involved me! So I started listening. apparently he was going to buy some of the products me and my friend just started to import. I was keen to realize how big a deal he is willing to make! It turned out, the first shipment was relatively small and he has to wait for the arrival of the next batch. Then he started telling a story about importing some similar products from the same place while he was away on a holiday to that place!

By this time I wasn't really feeling sleepy anymore and they already noticed I'm not asleep so I just decided to sit up and join in with the conversation. I did! I sat up, removed my headphones and started listening to his tale which sounded quite stupid to me. Yet, as it is a costume to respect the costumer, I showed interest and followed his stupid story with a big smile on my face. The conversation kept on going for some minutes, it was then, when I noticed that the whole scenery somehow evolved into a private jet of some sort!

I was sitting there having a conversation with that guy whom I didn't even know. My friend was busy dealing with his own business and giving some orders to his cousin who works for him. And the boss's room was now the cockpit and he was the pilot, having his assistant as his co-pilot! I remember checking my ticket, noticing it's a transit flight and it was more or less the time to land and change the plane but I realized, instead, the same plane is taking off again. I discussed this rather curious matter with the guy who was telling me stupid stories and he said that's the way it's supposed to be!

It was a smooth flight but I had this feeling something is about to go wrong. I wasn't really paying any attention to it but then suddenly the plane turned upright and started to fall! I could see the ground clearly below my feet. It was drawing closer and closer at an amazing speed. I could hear the engine roar. I could feel the weightlessness. I have never been so frightened in my entire life! I coward and closed my eyes. I was afraid to face my end like this!

I was breathing heavily. It took me a moment to make my peace with the fact that I am about to die within next few seconds and there is nothing I can do about it! The only thing I thought about, was how awful my mother would feel when she receives the new! I was horrified but I thought to myself: “there's nothing you can do about it so lets just sit back and leave everything to chance!” It was such a chaos all around me. everyone was panicked. They were all shouting and trying to do something to save themselves. And I was sitting there, gnashing my teeth, and trying to focus on survival! Then my brain started to function, craving more and more even for a tiniest piece of hope. I remembered, statistically, there is still a possibility for me to survive this crash. Then I thought the chance of being crippled is relatively high so I decided I would rather take my chances with death! Suddenly I noticed a tiny stall in the fall and the sound of the engines changed. My heart rose another bit! I decided to open my eyes and at least see what the hell's going on. Maybe there was something happening that can bring me more hope. It took all my courage to do so!

When I opened my eyes, I was lying down on a coach in a moving train. Still breathing heavily and scared to death. There wasn't any plane nor there was any crash. I still had my headphones on. And there wasn't anything playing.

The Bliss

As the cold sun rains darkness upon me,
I wander the mist,
And the forlorn lake of thy darkened eyes,
Embraces me.


Now I am lost in the dark.
As the candle withers,
The iron-cross melts,
Eternity shared in flesh.
And the renaissance of my barren existence
Ascends towards the nadir.


The motion of daylight's moan,
Symbol of remembrance,
I Evoke Thy Presence

Come Closer (Part I: The Arrival)

We walked through a corridor covered on both sides with ivy and other types of plants and flowers. At the end of the passage we arrived at a door, it was huge and was painted white like the rest of the building. The door was so clean, it looked as if it was painted exactly the day before. We passed through it and turned right. There, there was another corridor we had to pass. This one looked a bit creepy to me. It was long, very long, and all around it was painted pale sky-blue, even the floor tiles was of the same color. It somehow reminded me of a huge bathroom for an alien race of serpents or centipedes or something out of a Science-Fiction movie. But, there was a nice view outside the windows on its eastern wall that helped a great deal to ease my mind. They opened toward the garden on the front side of the building. The garden was so huge that from the ground floor one could not possibly see the outer walls which ran all the way around the premises of the facility. The sunlight, shining through the well-cleaned windows, was quite warming. It felt so pleasant that I actually let all the bad thoughts to go away and drift in the last day-dream I was about to have for a long period of time.

I don't really remember anything of that day-dream. The next thing I remember was arriving at the reception room. It was located at the end of the corridor. This room was also painted the same color. Later on I realized all the personnel's wing is colored the same. Yet, I could never find out the reason why it was that way. But this room didn't look that heart warming. Either it was the half closed window shutters or maybe the cheap-looking set of furniture placed completely unorganized around the room that make me feel that way. For a moment I started to analyze the the arrangement of the furniture and taking a good look at them but before even starting to do so, I found myself so stressed out and unfocused that I just let go of the whole thing and tried to stay focused on the task at hand. At the end of the room in front of the northern wall there was a desk. Behind it, this person in charge of the paper work and admission process was sitting. She looked quite pretty to me not very beautiful though. Compared to an average woman, she was rather tall and I liked her body's structure. Then I notice something in her eyes! something frightening, something loathsome. It felt like, to her, every person that ever entered through those doors behind me was some sort of a case-study or an experiment or even worse some sort of an object like a toothbrush! I so didn't want to be in her presence anymore, but it wasn't like I had any other options. If I wanted to finish this thing and get it over with I had to tolerate her presence for the next 20 minutes. The best thing I could do was to distract my thoughts and just ignore her. I did it quite well. Even to this day thinking back I can't remember anything of the of the things happened during the whole admission process. The next thing I remember is that I was called to follow some one who just arrived, to lead me to my housing for the next 3 weeks. [I gave it a lot of thoughts ever since and there's something that makes me believe that it wasn't 3 weeks at all. I can't say how long it lasted, but it just wasn't 3 weeks! I'm positive about that!]

This new person who just arrived was also a girl. Approximately the same age as the one sitting behind the desk, and more or less the same height, which was quite surprising, I remember myself thinking: “Why are these girls so tall?” Later on, there were times I found myself quite convinced that these tall girls are also of some other alien race, but my theory proved to be wrong! This girl was not as inhuman as the Desk Girl. This one had this glare in her eyes, something welcoming, something warm, something that let me trust her just a bit! [I venture to note that maybe that Something was the size of her breasts! Yet, I don't really stress on that idea, because I really think it was never about that. I just trusted her. And well, she never let my trust down.]

After a short farewell with my mother who was gentle enough to accompany me and ease me through this whole admission process, she walked me back through the pale sky-blue Alien corridor. Then we arrived at the huge white entrance door and we took the other door on its left side an entered another corridor. This one was colored all in white. This one didn't look alien to me at all, still Toilet-ish, but not alien! We walked to its end and passed through this white double panel door with reinforced windows on each of the panels. I changed my cloths for something more comfortable and was briefed about some of the rules and regulations of the facility. Then we took an elevator to the 4th floor. There was my room. The 6th one on the right side of the main corridor. It ran all the way through the southern wing of the building and connected the elevator and the lounge at the other end. I never bothered to venture around the premises of the southern wing and poke my nose into other people's affairs. I never felt interested to do so due to an unknown reason. Anyone who knows me must have been pretty surprised reading that last sentence. But it's true and that was what I did. Or better to say, what I didn't do! I was so nervous and agitated in the elevator, couldn't even wait one more second to see my roommate, after all she was the only reason I came there in the first place, but the moment we left the elevator, with every single step I felt more and more in doubt. When we arrived at the door to our room I halted. I just couldn't get myself to walk in! What am I going to say to her? "Hi! How do you feel?" or "Hi There! How has it been?" It just felt so extremely stupid and redundant. I believe my company also felt my reluctance! She put her hand on my shoulder, didn't really say anything, just look me in the eye and I got the message!

There was no way for me to give up now! My mind was made up! It was so clear to me! I just had to do it! I just had to go through with it! For the sake of everyone including me!

I nodded, giving her a signal that I would rather do it alone. She was kind enough to leave me, just whispering in my ear that she will see me back around the lunch time an I can always call her or her colleagues, from the direct line in the room, in case I need something! After she had gone, for another couple of minutes I struggled with my thoughts and wrestled around with the idea, how this first encounter is about to be! When I finally felt it's the time, I just turned the knob, opened the door and walked inside, without even thinking how it's going to turn out...

To Be Continued...

The Mechanics Of Destruction

In A Disoriented Mind,
An Excess Amount Of Unused Intelligence, 
Can B A Dangerous Force To Deal With, 
Dangerous Enough To Scare Me...

Die Liebe Nerþus'

Why Do I Feel So Lonely Without My Instrumentz?

And The Physical Shape Ov Light Bled

Here I Am...

Sittin In Front Ov My Laptop,
Keepin An Eye Outside The Window,

N The Beautiful Spring Rain Caressing The New Born Leaves,
N The Birds Singing So Excitedly N Jumpin From A Branch 2 Another,
N The Soft Music Which Iz Being Played,
N This Stupid Smile Dat Jus Doesnt Fade From My Face,

I Lost My Train Ov Thoughtz!

What Waz I Sayin?

Uh Yeah...

The Birds, New Bornz, Flying...

ReBirth Of De Mother Nature Iz Finally Here,

N Uh, So Beautiful She Lookz In This Tranquil Evening!